Naysayers

I just got my first email from a naysayer. “Don’t create your own site – single hit sites are not the future. Tough to make money, VERY tough.”

Now I might be a little new to this particular game of blogging and podcasting, but I’m not new to the game of life. I know that there are successes and there are failures. I’ve evaluated this and thought long and hard about it. I’m committed to the path I’ve started on, but willing to change the course along the way.

I am not willing to go back.

I also can recognize the negative experience of someone else spilling over into his or her advice. I asked for advice and I appreciated the response, but I hadn’t expected someone to tell me not to do it. I guess I got used to everyone I know supporting me and saying, YES! You can do this! YES! You will succeed! YES! It’s a great idea!

This got me thinking about all the naysayers I’ve met in my past. I’ve overcome a few hurdles and there was always someone poking at me, whispering that I couldn’t do it. It wasn’t my subconscious; it was an actual living, breathing person. When I wanted to become a little league umpire, most people said I couldn’t do it. I persisted to spite them.

What was so hard about putting on some gear and watching a ball game?

I learned later that it takes a lot of skill and dedication to be good. But, it gave me skills and experience I wouldn’t trade for anything. I saw a lot of good ball games, and I learned a lot about myself. I learned to be resilient because some nine-year-olds can throw a ball so hard and fast that the catcher can’t catch it. Luckily, some part of my leg was always there to deflect the ball.

I learned to listen to my gut. Some kids can’t find the strike zone; some kids never leave it. I had about one second to decide if the pitch was a strike or a ball; sometimes it’s too close to call. So you go with your gut. Trust your instinct. In one second, I had to decide: Would I have swung?

I learned that I didn’t have to be boxed into a traditional job. I was the only female umpire in the entire county, but I owned it. I knew I was representing all women. I brushed my hair, I painted my nails and I wore make-up. I wasn’t going to be some grubby, greasy blue. I was a lady. Some people didn’t like that.

I learned not to care. Some people told me I should go back to slow-pitch softball. They had the pleasure of being tossed out of the ballpark by the only female umpire in the county.

We all have people who tell us no. They tell us we’ll fail. They tell us we’ll never be able to succeed at whatever new thing we wish to pursue.

We have to eject them. It’s our duty. They don’t belong on our playing field.

So, in the spirit of politeness, I will send this woman an email in response, thanking her for her time and that will be the end of it.

Maybe it’s tough. That’s ok, I’ve done tough things before.

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9 thoughts on “Naysayers

  1. I love this! On our blog launch, a hater commented “Get a real job dude.” Needless to say, the comment was tossed right in the trash can. You’re so right about not taking the advice of naysayers. Really, it just reflects back on them. Reminds me of an inspirational post I read this morning over at The Daily Love: http://thedailylove.com/heres-how-you-can-be-happy-no-matter-how-other-ppl-are-being/

    Thanks for sharing..it’s definitely a pick-me-up to read this kind of thing while in the midst of struggling toward success 😉

    • I had a comment like that too! And it could have easily thrown me for a tailspin, but I really worked through it. I’m pretty sure the person who wrote it knew me because his/her comment was personal enough that I knew he/she had to be familiar to me, but impersonal enough that I couldn’t figure out who it was. Also, I say publish all comments and respond with grace. I had one lady tell me I was the problem with women in America because I ran from my ex’s arms to someone else’s and looked for pity on the internet. I published it and answered, “Well there you go.” because I couldn’t think of anything more dismissive. 🙂

      • Haha! I’m sorry about the haters you’ve had to deal with, but it’s good to hear that you manage to work through it. It definitely stings to hear negativity directed at you like that! But criticism is a sign you’re on the right track, so there you go 😉

      • I love that: criticism is a sign that you’re on the right track!

        I’ll have to remember that the next time no one laughs at my jokes (I do stand-up).

  2. Go Susanna! We all have fear, doubts, and people that tell us we’re not doing the right thing. But we gotta keep on doing, going along the path that leads to our dreams, otherwise how will we ever know if those dreams are the right ones for us?

    • Oh yeah, definitely fire friends who don’t support you. Thankfully, I don’t have that problem. My friends are amazing! I am so lucky! But, I think we give too much weight to what “others” in general think. We shouldn’t do that. Do the people who we care about love and support us? Yes. Good. That’s what matters.

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